Dying to Love (An FBI Romance Thriller Book 18) Read online

  Yep.

  This was bad.

  He could let his wife think he was screwing around, or he could tell her the truth and let her worry.

  His karma was going downhill fast. It looked like he was fresh out of options.

  Lie, and die by his wife’s hand for adultery, or tell the truth, and be babied until he took a bridge.

  Option B was the plan.

  “Olivia.”

  She moved toward him. “Why? I’ve given you almost seventeen years. I’ve been faithful. I’ve put up with so much shit that I deserve an award. I lived for years hiding here, raising your kids, and you take a mistress?”

  “Okay, calm down. It’s not like that.”

  She threw back the entire glass of wine.

  “You should slow down. You’re going to have one hell of a hangover in the morning, and you won’t like it.”

  She walked over to the counter, picked up the bottle, and chugged from it.

  “Screw you, you cheating bastard.”

  He stared at her. His temper was starting to simmer. While Gabe didn’t mind her accusing him since he understood why she’d think it, she was acting like an idiot. That was unacceptable.

  She was the Director of the FBI’s wife. She had to have some decorum—even in their home.

  “Who is she?”

  “His name is Doctor Lewis.”

  She stared at him.

  “I’m not cheating on you, Olivia. I had an appointment today because I found out last week that I have cancer.”

  The bottle fell from her hand.

  It hit the counter, cracking.

  “What?”

  “I had my physical last week. There was blood work, and they tagged it. They told me it’s cancer, and I had to visit Doctor Lewis’s office to get my CT scan results, and more blood work.”

  She stared at him.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked.

  “I didn’t want to worry you until I found out for sure. I didn’t want to scare you if it was something horrible. I needed to keep it to myself until I was ready to tell you.”

  She glared at him.

  “I would NEVER cheat on you. You’re my wife, you’re my heart, and you’re the mother of my children. That you think that I would…it worries me.”

  She didn’t speak.

  “I know I was acting odd, but I was trying to get to the appointments, get things scheduled, and handle the job. I was trying to be responsible.”

  “So you handled all of that, but you didn’t think to tell me that you had cancer?” she asked.

  Livy couldn’t believe that.

  She couldn’t believe any of this.

  What had seemed bad had gone so much worse. In fact, she wanted to rage around.

  He didn’t get it.

  He’d kept her out.

  She almost wished he was cheating.

  The man she loved was telling her that he was sick, but he didn’t care to tell her. After everything they’d overcome, she wasn’t even allowed to know something so life changing.

  “You shouldn’t drink so much.”

  She moved around the counter.

  Gabe thought she was coming for him. Instead, she walked right past him. She walked toward the door.

  “Where the hell are you going?” he asked, when she bent over and picked up her bag that was by the door.

  “I’m leaving.”

  “WHAT?” he asked.

  Where the hell was he?

  Was this some parallel universe?

  First, she accuses him of cheating, and then she tells him she’s leaving him.

  What?

  This was insanity.

  “You’re not going anywhere,” he stated. “You’re drunk, and you don’t need to get killed driving around like a lush.”

  He grabbed her wrist.

  When he tried to stop her, she swung, hitting him right in the face.

  “Jesus! What the hell, Livy!”

  “You didn’t tell me. I’m your wife, Gabriel. I’m the one you’re supposed to tell. I’m the one you confide in. You didn’t do any of that. You suck.”

  She walked out.

  Gabe motioned toward his security guys. “Drive her. She’s drunk.”

  They got her into a car.

  Then he watched his wife head off.

  Alone.

  Without him.

  And he thought today couldn’t get any worse.

  Man.

  Was he wrong.

  Chapter Five

  Tuesday

  Two Hours Later

  When she pulled up to the gate, security let her in. Gabe’s team got her access to Elizabeth’s home. Right now, she needed a place to go, and someone who wouldn’t make her angry.

  Elizabeth would understand.

  She was a wife, and she was trying to balance two times the masculine nonsense. How? Livy didn’t know. All she did know was Elizabeth deserved a medal.

  They both did.

  They were in the same shitty director boat.

  After the vehicle rolled to a stop and she climbed out, Livy headed toward the back door. She was met by Ethan, Elizabeth, and Callen.

  They all looked concerned.

  That meant that Gabe had called ahead.

  Of course he did. He was always trying to control every damn situation.

  “Livy! Are you okay?” Elizabeth asked. “What’s happening? It’s almost ten at night.”

  Everything gushed out of her like a fountain—the honesty, the words, and the pain. It was as if the cork was out, and she was helpless to stop it.

  “I thought he was cheating. I thought there was another woman, but he just told me he has cancer, and I left. I couldn’t stay there.”

  Callen looked surprised. He noticed Elizabeth and Ethan did not.

  They must have known.

  Oh boy.

  Elizabeth led her into the living room. “You’ve been drinking. I’m glad you didn’t drive here.”

  “Oh, well, he wouldn’t let me. You know how Gabriel is. He has to be the boss of every freaking thing in the universe!”

  Clearly, someone was angry.

  Ethan’s phone began ringing. AGAIN. He saw the display, and he knew who it was.

  Gabe was calling.

  He muted it, knowing that with a volatile drunken woman, answering would be a bad thing. It would be like tossing kerosene on an already raging fire.

  Yeah, no.

  “I don’t know what to do. I didn’t have anywhere to go. I’m so mad at him. How was I supposed to know it was cancer? I feel like an idiot.”

  Elizabeth patted her on the back in sympathy. She knew how difficult Gabe was to handle. She was in the same boat. Since Ethan had taken over as Deputy Director, he’d changed too. There were secrets about the government, there were meetings, and he was even more of a control freak.

  Yeah, she totally got it.

  “It’s okay. I’m sure Gabe knows that you didn’t mean anything by it. You were worried by his behavior, and that made you go there. Tomorrow, he’ll talk to you and it’ll be okay. He’s going to get the best medical treatment for his Gallbladder cancer.”

  Livy sniffled. “I know he will.”

  Then she stared at her friend.

  “Wait.”

  “What?” Elizabeth asked.

  “You aren’t surprised, and you know what kind of cancer he has. I don’t even know that! Why aren’t you shocked to hear that Gabe has cancer?”

  Both men stared at each other.

  This was going to be ugly. This was proof that Elizabeth was off her game because of the killer and dead babies. She’d inadvertently outed herself.

  Oh boy.

  The kerosene was uncapped.

  Elizabeth had learned a huge lesson that day. Lying was bad. She didn’t let her kids lie, so she wasn’t going to do it herself. It destroyed relationships.

  “Gabe told me today.”

  Livy gasped and stood up.

&
nbsp; “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked. “Why didn’t you let me know?”

  “Livy,” she began. “It put me in a bad position. He asked me not to say anything. I was stuck between you both.”

  She pointed at her in anger. “Girlfriend Code!”

  Well, crap.

  Crap!

  Crap!

  Crap!

  If this day didn’t blow to high Heaven, she didn’t know what did. Elizabeth should have stayed in bed. It was out of control—the truth about her and Chris, a crazy who was killing hookers, and now this.

  When would this day end?

  Apparently, not soon enough.

  “I’m aware, but I had to keep my mouth shut. I had to make a choice. Besides, I just…”

  She didn’t get to finish.

  Livy sucker punched her.

  Hard.

  In the face.

  Elizabeth hit the couch, and her hand went to her mouth.

  Callen went to her side, and Ethan moved between them.

  “I can’t believe you! You are supposed to be my friend! You betrayed me tonight, and I’ll NEVER forgive you. You’re the one who touts the whole ‘Girlfriend Code’, and you broke it. You’re dead to me!”

  Ethan had enough.

  There was no way he was going to let this behavior happen in their home. He wouldn’t allow Elizabeth to behave like this at the Rothschilds’ place, so it wasn’t flying here.

  “Olivia!”

  She went to go for Elizabeth again.

  Ethan stopped her.

  “You will not come into our home and hit someone,” he said, trying to stay calm. “I don’t care who the hell your husband is, and I don’t care what the hell reason you have. We don’t strike people here, so I suggest you grab your bag and you get the hell out of our house!”

  Livy stared at him.

  “She broke the code! She had that coming! She’s always been close to him! Of course she has his back. She always did! Only, no one has mine!”

  Ethan wasn’t having it.

  “I said GO!”

  “Fine. I’ll never be back.”

  She stormed for the door and nearly took Chris out in the process. He’d barely gotten out of the way. The table and lamp weren’t that lucky.

  The lamp hit the floor and shattered into a million pieces in the mêlée.

  “What the hell?” Chris asked, when Livy slammed the door behind him.

  He saw Elizabeth’s nose bleeding.

  “Chris, can you look at her?” Callen asked. “I don’t think it’s broken.”

  “What happened?”

  They told him.

  “What? Is she out of her damn mind?” he asked, dropping his medical bag beside the couch. He sat on the coffee table, and stared into her eyes.

  They were filled with tears.

  “Just check to see if it’s broken,” she whispered. “Then I’m going to bed. It’s been a horrible day, and I want to forget,” she stated. “I need to forget.”

  Chris touched her nose, checking to see if there was anything damaged.

  “Honey, it’s okay. Put this on it,” he said, reaching into his bag for an ice pack. When he twisted it, it began to get cold.

  She did what he said.

  Then she stood.

  “Thank you, Christopher,” she said, patting him on the cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  The three men watched her walk away.

  “I never thought I’d see the day where they’d fight,” Callen stated.

  Chris dropped down on the couch. “This is nothing.”

  Both men looked over.

  “Elizabeth just took a face shot and didn’t fight back. That’s hardly nothing,” Ethan stated.

  Chris grabbed a piece of pizza. His head was pounding, his gut was raw, and he was worried about his friend.

  “Once upon a time, there was Elizabeth, her close friend Gabe, and her partner, Livy.”

  They listened.

  “Livy and Gabe got married right after ‘The Butcher’ case. They eloped. They didn’t even invite her. They did it behind her back and then had the balls to show up at her door, tell her, and bail to Tahiti.”

  Callen stared. “No they did not.”

  Chris nodded his head. “They dropped the bomb and then they both left the country. They shoved her out of their lives, and she was left to fend for herself.”

  “That’s horrible,” Ethan said. “She’d killed that asshole for them.”

  “I know. It broke her. She cried for four days straight. Then for the next nine months, she was alone.”

  Callen opened a beer for Chris. “What do you mean?”

  “Livy wouldn’t even talk to Elizabeth. Gabe played mediator, but they didn’t speak. Livy made him choose. Her or Elizabeth, and Lyzee didn’t win that one.”

  “Seriously?”

  Chris nodded.

  “Elizabeth believed that Livy, deep down, blamed her for the rape. Had she been faster, smarter, or there, she could have stopped it.”

  The men were horrified.

  “It broke her. She was alone, scared, and the two people she trusted most had basically abandoned her. It was the lowest point in her life. She’d go to work and she’d be crucified by the other agents. Elizabeth was about to quit the FBI and leave Washington DC.”

  Callen got it.

  He really understood.

  Elizabeth had really been alone in the truest sense of the word.

  “After the baby was born, Livy did a complete turnaround. She invited us to see the baby, she said she was sorry, but she didn’t explain.”

  “Wow.” Ethan couldn’t believe it.

  “Livy has hurt her before. I don’t know how much more she’ll take. I think a little part of Elizabeth always feel like her friend has used her. She doesn’t trust many for a reason, and here it is.”

  They got it.

  “We better go see if she’s okay.”

  Callen agreed.

  “I’ll have more pizza and clean up. I need a shower and to be vertical.”

  Ethan patted him on the shoulder. “Thank you, Chris, for sharing this with us. We love having you as part of our family. Thank you for being there for her.”

  Chris simply nodded. He and Callen shared a look, and he knew the man really got it. Without him being there, who would have taken care of her?

  Now, he passed the baton.

  “Give her a kiss for me, and tell her it’ll be okay,” he offered, as the two men walked away.

  He hoped it would be.

  No, he prayed it would be.

  Upstairs, they found her in bed. She was lying there, crying softly into her pillow. Both men hurt for her. Not only because face shots hurt, but because having someone break your heart hurt far worse.

  “Baby, are you going to be okay?” Ethan asked, crawling onto the bed.

  She sobbed harder.

  Callen flanked her, curling his body against hers. “Shhhh, angel, we’re here. We’re going to get through this together. You’re not alone anymore. You have us.”

  Elizabeth was so damn angry.

  She was sick of it all.

  Livy was right. She’d broken the code as she was protecting someone, and it came back to bite her in the ass.

  “I hate this.”

  They both soothed her.

  She couldn’t help but mourn this. What had happened…it wasn’t going to be fixable, and she knew it. Even if Livy apologized, she wasn’t sure she could forgive her.

  At this phase of her life, Elizabeth didn’t have time, patience, or energy for toxic people.

  They took and took, and she didn’t want any part of them. She couldn’t.

  “I just want to sleep,” she whispered. “I just need to forget.”

  The men curled around her, and she closed her eyes. Her tear stained, freckled cheeks were raw from the bitterness of her weeping.

  She was bitter from the last twenty years.

  “We have you, baby,”
Ethan said. “Tomorrow is a new day.”

  They looked at each other.

  Was it?

  Was it really?

  Both men were thinking the same thing.

  Could Elizabeth bounce back from Livy hurting her…?

  Again?

  * * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *

  Across DC

  He was watching the news with eager anticipation. He wanted her to take the case in the worst way. He’d left all the hints, he’d dropped the clues, and all she had to do was go for the bait.

  There were roses ready to go.

  There was a list of hookers at his disposal.

  And he’d killed the two babies to get her to come to him. He was ready for anything.

  Oh, he’d planned perfectly, and it was going to work to his advantage.

  Just wait and see.

  Still…

  The news only showed her on the scene. It didn’t actually mention her taking the case.

  If that were the situation, he had one more hooker he could leave for her.

  He’d planned it out.

  In the morning, he’d watch her.

  He’d follow her around, and he’d make sure that she was up for one hell of a challenge.

  She’d never find him.

  Never.

  Elizabeth was his graceful angel, but she wasn’t going to figure this out.

  Well, not until it was too damn late.

  * * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *

  When Ethan called him back, Gabe was in bed. He knew where his wife was, simply because she had a security escort. They drove her to the hotel, they tucked her in, and they made sure she wasn’t a danger to herself.

  When his Deputy Director called, telling him what had transpired, he knew this was bad.

  Livy had struck another agent.

  Not only that, but she’d struck a director. That was a one-way ticket to Unemploymentville.

  She’d broken the rules and chances were, her career was over before it even really restarted. Elizabeth had her over a barrel, and he knew it. If she wanted to push this, Livy was done forever with the FBI. She’d never work another case, and she’d never wear a gun again.