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Revenge has Come (An FBI/Romance Thriller Book 19) Page 6
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Page 6
It was beautiful.
“I needed that.”
Yeah, so did she.
Ethan beat the hell out of the eggs. “I’m glad you were here,” he said, as she stuffed some jumbo pieces of bread with fruit and cream cheese.
“I would have been waiting for you until my last breath,” she admitted.
He reached across the counter and touched her hand. It bore only Callen’s wedding ring, and it broke his heart.
He felt so lost.
Once, she’d been his.
Now…
He was no one. Without his wife, he was another man trying to survive in a cold world.
God!
He’d been a fool.
“I’m sorry. I know I’ve said it a million times, but I am. God! I’ve never been sorrier, and I’ve done some shitty things in my life.”
She turned her hand over and gave his a squeeze to show she understood.
“There are no hard feelings.”
It was true.
Ethan didn’t speak. He couldn’t formulate a sentence.
“How long are you here for?” she asked when he remained silent. Yes, she already knew about the badge and gun, but she wanted to hear it from him.
“I handed in my temporary resignation.”
She stared at him.
It was still shocking to hear it from him.
That was something no one saw coming.
Ethan Blackhawk was the FBI.
“Wow.”
“You told me to decide, and I did. I would rather my wife than a badge. I would rather live here in Salem with my family than in that giant house alone and with two dogs who missed you.”
She didn’t know what to say.
“I have a shitload of personal time. My badge will be there if you and Callen decide to go back. If you don’t, I’ll find a job. There’s got to be something here for me.”
She stared at him.
Oh, there was a lot there for him.
Her.
She wanted him.
Elizabeth didn’t speak as she made the french toast. Instead, she had Ethan pour them both a coffee.
“Do you want to eat in the garden?” she asked. “It’s not as pretty as when we first did, but it’s passable. I’m a shitty gardener. I have no patience, and I don’t talk to the flowers. People will have me institutionalized.”
He smiled.
He’d missed her sense of humor.
“I’d eat in Hell on a floating chunk of brimstone with the Devil himself just to be with you.”
Her heart skipped.
“Want me to bring our coffees out?” he asked.
She was finishing up. “If you could. I’ll be right out,” she offered as she flipped the french toast. “Butter?” she asked.
“Real butter?” he replied automatically. “Or…”
She held up the butter dish. “Darlin’, I just ran. I’m eating the butter.”
He stared into her eyes but said nothing.
Elizabeth waited for him to say something, but he didn’t even open his mouth. Instead, he headed outside.
Once in the backyard, Ethan looked around.
It hadn’t changed much. There was a swing set, and it looked like Callen had built it.
He could tell.
Callen needed to stick with intricately plotted stories. He was horrible with a level.
Still…
It made his heart skip.
He had mentioned Cat wanted one, and Ethan was supposed to do it.
Only, he never had time.
Work had always come first.
He’d made excuses to his kids. He couldn’t go hunting because the work piled up. He couldn’t build his girls a swing set because he had a meeting at the Oval Office too many weekends to keep track.
He’d been a fool.
It broke his heart.
He’d let a lot of people down.
Himself included.
As he placed the coffees on the table, he saw a patch of daisies. It reminded him of the first flower that he had ever given her. Ethan was compelled to do it again.
He picked the biggest, happiest one in the bunch. Ethan knew if he was going to get the girl back, he had to pull out all the stops.
“Here’s breakfast,” she offered, coming out with a tray full of food in her hands.
He stopped her.
“You’re missing something.”
“What?” she asked, staring down at the food. It appeared to be all there.
“This,” he said, as he tucked it behind her ear.
Her heart skipped.
He got it.
Elizabeth didn’t have to tell him. Ethan realized that she was redoing that first day.
For him.
For her.
For them.
“Now you look complete,” he offered. “In fact, it’s safe to say that I’ve never seen a more beautiful woman in my whole life,” he offered.
That took her breath away.
“Ethan.”
He took the food from her hands and placed it on the table. He wasn’t hungry for anyone but her, and he needed to work for it.
This was going to take atonement, and he knew it.
She watched him.
Ethan returned to her side to escort her to the table. When she sat, he slid in her chair.
Yeah, she’d lost a lot of weight. She felt as light as a feather, and that broke his heart.
Then he stared down at the cast, and that also hurt.
Ethan needed to make this right.
He sat across from her as she handed him the plate with food on it.
“I hope you enjoy it,” she said.
“I will. I haven’t had decent food in weeks.”
“What about the housekeeper?” she asked.
“I gave her the seven weeks off. I wasn’t good company. It was just me, the dogs, and security.”
She cut off some french toast and speared it with her fork. Then she held it out for him to eat.
Elizabeth felt the need to feed his heart, body, and soul.
Blackhawk accepted it.
As he chewed, he watched her.
What kind of man walked away from a woman like this out of anger? He’d been so far gone.
He deserved to have his ass kicked.
Picking up a strawberry, he dipped it through his whipped cream and fed it to her.
When Elizabeth’s hand touched his, as he held it to her lips, their eyes met.
“My sweet Elizabeth,” he said. “I don’t deserve this second chance with you.”
“You deserve everything,” she replied. “You were made to be mine, and that makes you more than deserving, Ethan. I know my lie hurt you. I hope you believe that I really didn’t have a choice.”
He saw that now.
“Doctor Gaines helped me see that. Until that night, when I came home to see you gone, I thought I was in the right. When I walked into our house and listened to the ghosts, I figured it out.”
She listened.
“I wanted to die.”
Elizabeth hated to hear that.
“I wanted to end my life when you were gone. I won’t lie. I thought about it.”
That horrified her.
She thought about what she could have lost.
She pushed her plate away.
“Ethan.”
“No, let me continue, please.”
Elizabeth let him.
“I wanted to swallow my gun each and every night. I wanted to end my pathetic life.”
She reached across the table and ran her fingers over the ring on his finger.
It was hard not to wonder where hers were.
“I couldn’t do it. That would be the easy way out, and that would hurt you more. I don’t want to be your wound, Elizabeth. I want to be your husband.”
“You are my husband.”
He picked up her fingers and left a kiss across the knuckles. They were soft, familiar, and the hand lotion re
minded him of her.
He’d missed that too.
“I want you back.”
She sipped her coffee.
“I know I don’t deserve the right to say that, but it’s the truth.”
“Welcome back.”
He stared at her. “That’s all?”
“Yes. I’m not going to make you suffer because you hurt me. You’re my husband—not my enemy.”
To hear her say the ‘H’ word melted some of the chill in his soul. If she was saying it, she meant it.
This was, after all, Elizabeth.
“I missed you,” she stated.
Oh, he knew what that was like. He was dying inside with the feelings he was having.
It was time to show her.
It was time to give Elizabeth a peek into his heart.
“I’ve missed a few things over the last seven weeks too,” he admitted.
“What?” she asked.
“This,” he said, holding out his hand. When his wife took it, Ethan pulled her to her feet and into his body. There was no music, but he swayed them back and forth.
Him in his dress clothes, and Elizabeth in her running gear. They must look odd, but he didn’t care.
It felt right.
Elizabeth dropped her head to his shoulder. It felt amazing to have her back against his body. Ethan’s large hand was pressed to her back, holding her close.
Lately, she’d felt out of control, but now…
She felt safe.
“I’ve missed holding you like this,” he admitted. “One of my favorite things in the world is when you dress up, and we go out. You’re beautiful in running shoes, and your equally beautiful in heels.”
She let him talk.
“I missed the feel of us pressed together like this. I’ve had to go to a few dinners, and this was exactly what was missing.”
“Did you dance with anyone else?” she asked, picturing that hussy redhead who was trying to poach her man.
“The First Lady.”
Elizabeth was okay with that. She got it. He had to do the job. When in DC, you had to swim with the sharks.
“I didn’t want to do it. Honestly, no one can compare to you. No one is you.”
Elizabeth let him continue talking, simply because she missed hearing his voice.
It was like warm whiskey flowing over glassy ice cubes. It was smooth, sexy, and sinful. The way he whispered in her ear, it sent chills racing across her body.
“Know what else I missed?” he asked.
She lifted her head. “What?”
“This,” he said, right before he spun her out. Elizabeth laughed as he held her hand.
She hadn’t expected it.
The sound of his laughter brought a smile to her face. It was genuine. It was unfettered.
It stole her breath.
He looked so damn handsome.
Stress lines and all.
She spun back in, and he held her to his body as they continued to have fun. Ethan did it again, but this time, when she came back into his body, he dipped her and held her there.
“Ethan,” she said, as she hung in his arms. She didn’t doubt he had her.
“Elizabeth, do you know what else I’ve missed?” he asked, moving his mouth closer to hers.
She held her breath barely able to focus on anything other than his sexy plump lips.
Thank God for his gene pool.
“What?” she asked.
“This,” he offered, as he sealed his mouth to hers in one hell of a welcome home kiss.
Time, in that moment, stopped all around them.
It ceased to exist.
All either of them felt was the pounding of the other person’s heart.
That thump.
Thump.
Thump.
It was like a Native on drums, sending out the signal that they were there, ready, and on the cusp of something huge.
Ethan was about to reclaim his wife. Seven weeks, eight hundred miles, and the fear of a divorce were too much to keep bottled up. The need was there, simmering right below the surface. He was ready to boil over.
His wife had that effect on him.
Her hands slid up his arms, to his neck, and into his hair. It was amazing to feel her fingers sliding through it.
He’d missed this too.
Ethan had missed everything.
That one kiss was beautiful.
Slowly, Ethan pulled his mouth from hers. Their breaths were quick, there was the telltale thump in her throat as he touched her pulse.
“Ethan.”
He righted her back to her feet.
“Know what else I missed?” he asked.
She could barely speak. That one kiss erased nearly seven weeks of so much pain. Her soul knew his.
It was calling to her.
He was calling to her.
“What?” she asked.
He reached into his shirt and pulled the chain from his neck. On it, there were three things. Both of her wedding rings, and the key to his heart.
“I miss knowing you have these,” he admitted.
Her diamond glittered in the sun.
She’d missed it too.
“I know I don’t deserve your love or your trust after what you’ve had to live through, but I want you to have them back.”
She went to speak.
His cell phone rang.
It was ‘Hail to the Chief’. They both knew who was on the other line.
“It’s okay,” she said. “It’s the President. I get it. You have to take it.”
He stared at her. She had already begun the emotional retreat. That one call had erased everything he’d regained the last forty minutes.
Had he damaged her this much? The light had begun coming back, and it was gone again. Her eyes were alive, and in that moment, they died all over again.
All it took was one phone call.
There was only one thing to do.
Ethan walked over to his coffee mug, pulled the phone from his pocket and dropped it into the liquid. It took the creamy plunge.
She gasped and covered her mouth. “Ethan!”
He turned quickly, and it must have scared her. Elizabeth, immediately, took a step back.
Yeah, he’d damaged her.
Big time.
He was a huge asshole.
“I don’t want to talk to him. He’s intruding on something more important. I’m here with you. That’s what matters. You have my full attention.”
He saw it in her eyes.
“Can I do something?” he asked.
“I guess.”
He moved toward her, closing the gap. Ethan, with such gentleness, dropped the chain over her head and down her shirt. “I know I don’t deserve you wearing my things, but I want you to have them. Toss them, sell them, or dump them in the toilet, but I want you to know I saved them for you. For us.”
She didn’t have words.
Honestly, Elizabeth was still trying to get past the fact that he’d dropped his work phone into a mug of coffee. He’d killed it, and for her.
That.
Was.
Huge.
When she didn’t speak, he kept going. He was going to give her everything he had, and then let the chips fall where they may.
What did he have to lose at this point? Everything was on the line.
“Can I do one more thing?” he asked.
“Okay.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a marker. He knew from his son that they all had signed her cast to cheer her up.
Well, he felt compelled.
He wanted his name on her in the worst way. Maybe because he wanted to reclaim her, or maybe because he wanted the world to see his name there.
They had to be okay.
He had everything riding on it.
Taking her casted arm, he began writing. Elizabeth watched him, her heart overflowing with emotions.
When he was done, he released her.
&
nbsp; “Read it.”
She read his words. Where she’d expected to see only his name, there was more.
Jesus!
There was so much more.
‘Will you marry me again?’
Beneath it, there was a heart with his name and hers. He’d filled that space in that Callen had left blank. Suddenly, that hole in her chest was gone.
He got it.
Ethan realized that he had to change in order to be part of their lives, and it was a beautiful thing.
No longer was she daydreaming about what they had, but she was now thinking about what was possible now that they were back as a unit.
They could move on.
They could have love.
They could heal.
There was nothing to stop them now that they’d come back to the center. She needed this moment more than she needed her next breath.
This was them.
While it may seem corny to redo this day, it had mattered on some deep level.
It saved them.
It had healed their souls.
“Elizabeth?” he asked, staring into her eyes. Then he realized he needed to do one more thing. “My sweet, precious Elizabeth.”
“Yes?” she asked.
It was now or never.
He knew it.
Going with his gut, he dropped to his knees and stared up at her. This was something he’d replayed over and over again in his mind.
He’d planned it.
He’d plotted it.
He’d control freaked it.
It was time to make it happen.
“I’ve only ever asked one person this before, and she said yes. Now I need to know if you’ll say yes too.”
Her heart skipped.
“Elizabeth Renee LaRue Whitefox, will you take my name again, and will you be my wife? Will you forget what we had so I can give you something better? Will you let me show you that my love is overflowing, all encompassing, and always meant to be yours?” Ethan asked.
She looked him in the eyes.
He was watching her with those deep blue-black eyes, and she couldn’t love him more.
Still…
“No, Ethan, I don’t want to remarry you and forget our relationship.”
His heart dropped.
In that moment, every hope, dream, and chance was lost. It had been his only shot at redemption to make this mess better. Now it was over.
Ethan let her hand go.
“I see. I’m sorry.”
She didn’t think he did see, so she figured she’d elaborate. Ethan wasn’t good at subtle—especially not when it came to her.